Flirting — A dying art of communication

Martin Svaneborg
7 min readJan 11, 2021

If you find them sexist, it’s just because you are not interested.

Martin Svaneborg (photo by Michael Jensen. world-photo.dk)

Once upon a time in a beautiful town called Verona, there was a boy who fell head over heels in love with this girl he met at a party. They were from rivalling families, the Montagues and the Capulets. The families despised each other, so an introduction was highly flammable. But he did not care. He just walked right over to her, and in a flood of exuberantly flirtatious phrases told her how hot she was. Oddly enough, this brash, inappropriate declaration of attraction did not offend her. She was intimated yet charmed. Of course, she did not respond immediately to his bold move, as he delivered it in such an out-of-context, weird and unexpected manner. He continued to stalk her day and night, lurking around her yard at odd hours. Even hiding under her balcony. When she noticed his stalky behaviour, she was, surprisingly enough, not appalled. Quite the contrary. She took well to it and invited him to continue his stalky behaviour, which so many others should have been disgusted by and maybe even compelled to report to proper authorities, so they could have thrown the insolent youngster into a correctional facility befitting of his disgusting behaviour. The reason for her completely unreasonable acceptance of his behaviour was very simple. She was interested.

Sexism is a scorching hot topic in recent years. Since the launch of the #Metoo movement by Tarana Burke back in 2006, with the goal of providing a chance for healing to victims of sexual abuse and sexual harassment by enabling victims to speak up, it exploded in 2017 with the exposure of a certain American film-producer. Since then, the fight against sexism has blazed on, but in my personal opinion the healing part has got somewhat lost in the short-term, superficially gratifying achievement of judgement and eternal punishment. I am all for the #Metoo movement in Tarana Burke’s original form, but much to my sadness, we are seeing accidental, innocent casualties in the war against sexism. One of the soldiers lying wounded and dying by the wayside is the flirt.

DISCLAIMER

If you have not figured out where I am going with this somewhat random opening, it is not to state an opinion about either sexism or sexual harassment, but to offer comment on the communicative…

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Martin Svaneborg

Trained as an actor, singer and dancer and son of an alcoholic. Now, more a writer with a perspective and motivation to serve..